September 19, 3:53AM, 6 lbs. 4 oz.

19 Sep By

I was sure that I had wet my pants for the fourth time that day. The back pain was understood. I mean, I was very pregnant! “Any day now” people would say as I walked passed. Yes, yes. Any day now.

******

Turns out it wasn’t pee. I was in labor. That next morning at 3:53AM, God gave me the most precious gift He could have ever given me. A son.

I didn’t deserve him, and I had no idea what to do with him.

But, God knew.

He knew my heart for motherhood and trusted me with a healthy baby boy.

I wish I had some glorious labor and delivery tale to type for you. But, the truth is, I can only remember snippets of the account. Whenever I reminisce, I knit the snippets together. Looking back on this day, I am quickly reminded just how surreal it all was. Every emotion I have about this day could never be captured in one post. Not if I wanted you to ever come back, anyway. I’m not even sure I want to try to capture every emotion from this day without the supervision of a professional therapist. I’m just sayin’. I was young, naive, and scared. 

But, most importantly, I was a mother.

Such wise eyes. An old soul from day one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I didn’t know what I was doing then and I don’t know what I’m doing now.

As the mother to a 14 year old young man, I should have figured it out by now, no?

Today, as my son was opening a birthday card he got in the mail, I couldn’t help but notice how thoughtful he is.  I mean, he’s taken it upon himself to call each sender and thank them personally for any cards that come in the mail. You may not know, but this is a big deal. Phone conversations make him extremely nervous, and he hates them. But, he’s determined to push through the awkward timing of a real call to say “um. thanks”, and I guarantee that the person on the other is smiling.

I keep watching him as he reads the cards. He’s more interested in what the cards say than how much money they hold. He looks up from his reading and smiles with pride. He’s smiling because the kind words others have spoken to him in writing warm his heart. I wipe a quick tear and smile back. He holds up the cash, and I love that he’s genuinely surprised that the amount is “so much”. His innocence is special gift to me. 

In this moment, I want him to know how proud I am of him, and I say, “Sweetheart, you have such a grateful heart. You make me so proud. ”

“Thanks to you for raising me right!”, He says with the swagger of a grown man.

Then he walks over and gives a hug. A real hug. One he innitiated.

His hug tells me silently that he gets it, and I cry like a baby. My emotions come full circle as I am reminded on this special day just how blessed I am to be given this gift I do not deserve. All I can do is hug him back. 

Happy Birthday, Baby!

I’m so proud of you!

The best thing that every happened to me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Adrienne

Somewhere along the way I picked up homeschooling two boys and blogging. When I'm not scrubbing toilets or answering endless questions, I'm usually here, over sharing it all! My writing is always honest, sometimes sarcastic, and never perfect. I hope to keep my kids from seeking adult therapy. I know. Pipe dreams...You can find me as @TheMommyMess on Twitter and on Facebook.

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Filed Under: motherhood, parenting, raising boys, raising teens

28 Comments

Comments

  1. Alison
    Twitter:
    says:
    September 19, 2012 at 3:01 am

    Happy Birthday, young man! Continue to make your mom happy, okay?
    Alison recently posted..Great ExpectationsMy Profile

    Reply
  2. Stasha
    Twitter:
    says:
    September 19, 2012 at 6:55 am

    Aww.

    Happy Birthday!

    Those hugs that come out of the blue, initiated by the kiddo? Those are the best hugs, EVER!

    Seriously.
    Stasha recently posted..Acknowledge and Let GoMy Profile

    Reply
  3. Barbara says:
    September 19, 2012 at 8:30 am

    What a great kid! Happy Birthday!
    Barbara recently posted..Noah 9 monthsMy Profile

    Reply
  4. Wayne
    Twitter:
    says:
    September 19, 2012 at 10:02 am

    Happy birthday!
    Wayne recently posted..Wednesday HodgepodgeMy Profile

    Reply
  5. Marie C. Leconte says:
    September 19, 2012 at 11:52 am

    Happy birthday to your son!
    You are right you are blessed with a wonderful gift. His grateful heart also tells that you are a great mom.

    Reply
  6. Tricia says:
    September 19, 2012 at 1:28 pm

    So lovely! Happy birthday to your boy!
    Tricia recently posted..She loves meMy Profile

    Reply
  7. Diana says:
    September 19, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    Aww. I totally teared up reading that. You’re a lucky mom for sure!
    Diana recently posted..PYHO – Whiny ButtMy Profile

    Reply
  8. Katy @ Experienced Bad Mom
    Twitter:
    says:
    September 19, 2012 at 3:23 pm

    Aww, so sweet and special! What a wonderful gift (on many levels/in so many ways). So nice that he complimented you for raising him right, too!!
    Katy @ Experienced Bad Mom recently posted..Stuff My Kid’s Soccer Coach SaysMy Profile

    Reply
  9. Shell says:
    September 19, 2012 at 4:12 pm

    Aw, what a sweet guy! Happy birthday to him!
    Shell recently posted..Pour Your Heart Out: It’s DifferentMy Profile

    Reply
  10. Julia says:
    September 19, 2012 at 10:26 pm

    Awww that is so sweet he made the decision to call and say thank you on his own. Shows what a great job you’ve done.
    Julia recently posted..At 22 MonthsMy Profile

    Reply
  11. Missy | Literal Mom says:
    September 20, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    Happy Birthday! I don’t know that we, as parents, ever figure it all out in regard to parenting! But hopefully we can help each other along the way. :)
    Missy | Literal Mom recently posted..Writing About FamilyMy Profile

    Reply
  12. ilene
    Twitter:
    says:
    September 20, 2012 at 4:11 pm

    Oh, Adrienne, This gave me chills! He is such a special young man! And that innocence makes my heart break! Happy birthday to your amazing son!
    ilene recently posted..The Sisterhood of the Traveling Manpants {It’s My SITS Day!}My Profile

    Reply
  13. AnnMarie says:
    September 20, 2012 at 11:46 pm

    Happy Birthday to your young man! He sure is a handsome one. You got me with the hug. I was okay until the hug.
    AnnMarie recently posted..The Anti-Social Bug Bit MeMy Profile

    Reply
  14. Molly Jo
    Twitter:
    says:
    September 24, 2012 at 12:24 am

    Visiting from Shell’s page. You’re obviously doing something right! Keep it up. He sounds like a wonderful young man. You should BOTH be proud.
    Molly Jo recently posted..RECIPE: Mocha Flavored Coffee MixMy Profile

    Reply

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