When you’re disappointed, it’s hard to pretend that everything is fine.
It’s hard to smile when you just don’t feel like it.
Your attempts to fake it are quickly revealed as the lie that they are, and the day just starts to unravel.
You try to keep the little things from bothering you, even though you know it’s really the big things you have no control over that have you feeling defeated.
*****
When you pray with your children and ask God to give your family something He does not, it’s disappointing.
You tell them what you think you should…Kids, sometimes God doesn’t answer our prayers the way we want him to, but we have to trust Him anyway.
As the words fall out of your mouth, your heart hurts and you try to hold back the tears, because you really don’t understand either.
*****
It’s hard to look your husband in the eye and see a reflection of your own disappointment.
You want to tell him that you’re sorry God did not say “yes”, but you’re unsure of the state of his faith and you just don’t want to rock the boat.
He knew you were praying, but yet, it didn’t happen.
My mind begins to wonder.
Will this be a setback for him?
Will he just put this on the list of reasons he doesn’t get God?
Was he counting on God this time?
Did he put his trust in Him this time, only to be disappointed?
*****
When you’re disappointed, it’s hard to pretend you’re not.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.~Isaiah 55:8
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Disappointment can be a big test of faith. It can also help to shape us into people who are resilient. Sometimes that just takes time.
Patricia P recently posted..Why Blogging and Cooking Don’t Mix
Twitter: themommymess
says:
I know Gods plans are better than mine, it’s just hard to wait for Him sometimes.
Heard. It really IS hard not to show disappointment.
Teresa recently posted..Back to school SOON!
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Yes it is.
Twitter: fiercedivablog
says:
First of all, I have such admiration and respect for your faith. And I totally understand how that “spiritual mismatch” could exacerbate “the disappointment.” My husband and I come from different religious backgrounds, and although I have left the religion of my childhood, I have embraced a very strong spirituality that nourishes me, allows me to nourish my loved ones and sustains me with faith. But it’s hard to “walk that path alone.” I am so sorry for your recent disappointment. xo
ilene recently posted..Light
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Thank you so much. It is hard to walk a path of faith without him.
I figure since God knows everything, He knows when I’m disappointed, too. So I don’t try to hide it too much- for me, it helps the feeling pass quicker.
Shell recently posted..Pour Your Heart Out: Gone in an Instant
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Good point! Maybe it would pass quicker, if I just owned it.