Are you overwhelmed with the amount of social media options out there?
I am.
It’s like a bad night at Golden Coral. Which of course, I hate because I hate buffets, and then I realized that’s why I was so sick last night. I ate too much social media.
As an aspiring writer and blogger, building my blog community is important to me. I want to meet new people, connect, and generally be “out there” in the social media spotlight.
There’s just one problem. So does every other Jane Blogger from Kalamazoo to Timbuktu, and tons of companies know it. They prey on our need to be recognized and discovered, as we are sucked into the vortex of yet another social media website.
When do we draw the line?
How much is too much?
How do we set ourselves apart from being another number in the buffet line?
I think the answer is simple. It’s quality not quantity.
It’s not about the number of subscribers or followers you have. It’s about the connections you make with your readers. This is all starting to sound very Jerry-Maguire-mission-statement-ish, and that’s not what my intention was, but I’ve had a beer, and perhaps I need to go to bed?. Come to think of it. So did Jerry Maguire, but…
With a recent move to WordPress and new blog URL, I’m eager to build my blog. I made the infamous move of changing the URL of my RSS feed, before realizing I would lose all of my subscribers. I’m impulsive. I can’t help it. I just wanted the feed URL to match the new blog name, started clicking and not reading those huge warnings, and before I knew it I was screaming NOOOOOOO!
In a panicked and impulsive blog haze, I began signing up for every social media platform out there in the hopes of connecting with readers that once were. Perhaps you’ve gotten a few of those invitation emails from me. I’m really sorry about.
Last night, I realized that’s dumb.
I was losing sight of the focus I had when I came to my new home. I just want to write, and hopefully someone will like it.
Blog communities are wonderful, but we don’t need to join 400 of them! Note to self. Find a few that fit your niche and spend your time in them wisely.
If we join every social media platform out there only giving a “half-assed” approach because we’ve spread ourselves too thin, then we’re selling ourselves short of the connections we could have made had we not been obsessing about numbers.
We need to stop doing that.
Once you find a few sites that work for you, actually get to know people. Visit other bloggers frequently. Be sure to leave comments and feedback. Then, guess what? When they come over to your blog they will read your most recent post and like it, because you stopped worrying about numbers and put some of that energy into actually writing.
If your content is worth reading, people will come back. Social media can help us make an initial connection, but readers aren’t going to stay readers just because you liked their Facebook page.
Don’t get me wrong. Social Media and blogging have enabled me to make some real friendships! It has given me the opportunity to meet people that I have tons in common with, and would not have otherwise been able to meet.
I value the relationships I’ve made through blogging, but I want to continue to value the new relationships, too. I want readers that actually read my blog. I want the community I build to “get me”. I want people to like my writing. I shudder at the thought that you hate it, but that’s ok. You will find another blogger. I promise. I don’t want “hit and run” traffic. I want you to come back. Even more, I want you to want to come back.
So I’ve deleted my account on a few social sites that I hastily set up before realizing that was not the way I wanted to go. It felt good, too.
I feel I am suffering from *stickittothemaniosis. Maybe it’s the beer?
I think I should stop talking now.
Did you read this far? I can’t believe it.
What do you hate about the social media buffet?
I know there’s gotta be something.
*If you do not know what stickitothemaniosis is, you must rent School of Rock with Jack Black. Now.
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Let me just say that I am glad we “reconnected” via Linkedin this week! It made my week, seriously it did. I hear ya and I so agree with you! There is way to many social media platforms to join. Candidly, I don’t have time. However, I do enjoy Twitter when I have time for it and the connections I have made (I have made some great virtual friends on Twitter too, one of them is someone I consider a best friend). I think each of us needs to find what we are comfortable with and what works. However, I must say I will draw the line at a fb page for my blog, not going to do it. You get me on twitter and the blog, period. I’m contemplating the move from blogger to wordpress right now and changing my domain name and blog name…it’s a lot to consider and take in – especially when I work full-time and have an online shop. Anyhow, I’m glad you are feeling some of what I feel in the social media community as well – it’s nice to know I am not alone. Have a wonderful evening and I will see you soon!
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Hi Heather! I’m glad you found me too. Especially, since I only had the Linked in account for like 30 minutes before I was totally overwhelmed and deleted it. Hahaha! There’s got to be a better way? No? I love WP! Period. SO glad I moved. I highly recommend @AshleyNAbele to help you with the transfer. She’s awesome!
I’ve decided to stick with facebook, twitter, and pinterest. Mostly, those things are addicting enough that they don’t feel like an obligation — although I have to admit twitter takes a back seat most of the time
. I have a google plus account, but I do not use it much. I only signed up because they took away my Blogger Friend Connect widget, and I thought I would need to replace those followers through another method. But, I am finding that having networked blogs on my sidebar is working just fine for now. I loved this article!
Amy B recently posted..Product Review: Amazing Science Volume 1
Twitter: themommymess
says:
I do love me some Pinterest! I’m not into Google+. I didn’t realize I signed up until I had the account. Google is tricky that way.
I dabble in social media, but honestly my blog is where my heart is so that’s where I focus my time. I choose to spend time on the blogs of people who spend time on mine, and Twitter and Facebook come second, a distant second. I just don’t have time to do it all.
Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell recently posted..The McClain Sisters – Have You Ever Seen Such Sparkling Smiles?
Twitter: themommymess
says:
See, you’ve got it all figured out Liz!
Amen, Amen, Amen!!!! So many times you write what I am thinking. I want to be out there, too but after being out there, I see that there are SO MANY out there. I love the question you asked about the buffet. I don’t want to be the side dish that everyone passes up. I want to be the one that everyone is in line to get. I haven’t overloaded yet since I just found the “blogging world” but I can totally see how it will happen if I spread myself short. I already found myself following blogs that I know have nothing in common with me in the hopes of building my followers number and it felt so wrong. I have vowed not to do that anymore. You are so right about hit and run visits. What good is 700 followers if no one is really reading? To answer your question, I hate the guilt. Knowing it’s out there and afraid that I am doing it wrong by not doing enough.
By the way, what happened to you is exactly why I haven’t bought my domain yet or transferred over to WP yet (but I am taking the next class with Ashley and Shell).
AnnMarie recently posted..Please Have a Laugh at My Expense
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Thanks for such an honest comment. The bloggy guilt comes and goes. Just don’t let it get to you. It takes time to build a blog, and you’ll get there! My move to WP was SOOOO easy! I love WP so far and I’m thrilled I made the move! Ashley, set up my feeds the RIGHT way! Then, I didn’t listen to her (because I’m impulsive) and messed it up. So, it’s not something you have to worry about.
I just realized I said, “spread myself short” (not sure one can actually do that) when I meant “thin”. Mental note to get off the computer when I should be asleep.
AnnMarie recently posted..Please Have a Laugh at My Expense
I did the same thing and signed up for every platform that I heard of. I quickly realized that some just were not for me, and honestly I don’t have time to do it all. I do what I can and what works best for me.
Kimberly recently posted..They Teach So Much
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Exactly! I don’t know anyone who could manage them all. We miss something when we speedily try to reach everyone. I’m not sure if “speedily” is a real word, but I’m leaving it there.
I do my best with social media and I think I’m slowing getting it all under my belt. Half the time I forget some of the things my friend told me to sign up for but as long as I remember the ones that mean the most I’m good!
Julie recently posted..Baby shower season
so true! don’t worry, you have a new subscriber here;)
bonnie ferrell recently posted..Flashback Friday!
I’m a facebook kind of gal, i can’t seem to keep up with Twitter. And I’m considering deleting my linkedin acct, I set it up in haste and I just don’t get it. I like that you are keepig it simple and sticking with the social media that you like.
Julia recently posted..Dinner Can Wait
Twitter: themommymess
says:
I set up Linked in during that panic I mentioned, and then I deleted it about 30 minutes later when I had about 400 emails from them telling me to “see what suzy Q has been up to”.
You summed up my feelings so well. I thought I just felt that way because I’m a little older (had my kids later and could be mom to many of you all.) WAY too much social media for me out there!
Pam recently posted..Choose to be Kind
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Well, it’s not just you! That’s for sure.
We own about 10 DVD’s – School of Rock is one of them.
Regarding your post, amen. I completely agree.
jessiebee recently posted..I did something right.
Twitter: themommymess
says:
I LOVE that movie! I laugh so hard every time. Thanks! I’m glad I’m not the only who’s overwhelmed with all these choices.
Thanks for your comment on my “Social Media Pet Peeves.” How funny that so many posts are centered around it today! I so agree with you about all the sites. There was a day that I was signed up to anything and everything that crossed the social media lines. I had tons of comments on my posts, but they were without connection. I trimmed everything back and now just have a few loyal comment peeps that I actually have relationships with. Before I was burnt out and couldn’t keep up, now I am fulfilled and happy!
Great post!
Crayon Wrangler recently posted..Social Media Peeves
I hate that we can’t figure out that what works for one person may not work for everyone. I hate just maintaining fb and twitter.
I hate that it’s never enough.
Maggie S. recently posted..Planning for the New School Year
Word….
I do FB the most because I enjoy it the most…then twitter, but it’s been slowing down recently, seems more promotional than anything…
I have a google plus page, but that’s only for Social Fabric…
I just don’t think I can keep up with anything else
Not a Perfect Mom recently posted..Oh Ryan Gosling….You Always Know What To Say
Oh Adrienne, I’ve been where you are. It took me a while (blogging for 5 years) and I’ve recently – just recently – calmed down about the numbers and the crazy drive to join everything, and started having fun. And guess what? Things in my blogosphere are starting to work out. And… I’ve met you! That’s another notch in the Bonus column.
(I’m happy to share what ever I’ve learned. It may not be mind blowing, but every little bit helps, right? ;-> )
Ann Harrison recently posted..Virtual Girls Night Out – Ultimate Blog Party ’12 !!!
Twitter: themommymess
says:
All of the fluff can really drain your focus. I’m glad I figured that out! Thanks for the encouragement!
Oh the suck of social media. Did you ever get into Klout? Because at some point, we all did and got obsessed and just ridiculous. If our Klout dropped, we felt the need to devote even more time we did not have to Twitter and guess what happened? A bunch of us burned out and thought, this is stupid, why are we letting our lives get run by social media. So I decided to stop checking Klout, eased off on Twitter, and realized I did not need an application telling me how popular (or unpopular) I was. I deleted the account.
And Google+? I have it but never use it. StumbleUpon? I used it for a little while then forgot about it. Pinterest? I only Pin on weekends now, if at all, and if I come across a good recipe/ craft. Twitter, yes, I leave my Hootsuite on but I lurk more than I tweet. Facebook, yes, I leave the page up too, but I usually only check it after I check my emails, write, and have generally very little to do.
I rather spend my time writing and reading other blogs! I do know we need social media to make the connections, and in some instances, continue it. But to keep growing your blog, the best thing to do is focus on THE BLOG.
And I’m sorry about my long rambling comment (or blog post)!
Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..I Wonder . . .
Twitter: themommymess
says:
I love your blog post, er, I mean comment! I’m not sure, but I think your comment might even be better than my post? Haha Thanks for all the feed back.
I have no idea what klout is, and I’m glad. It sounds like it would have been keeping me up at night. I deleted my linked in account, stumble upon, and google+. Linked in made me mad, because as I was hastily setting it up, I was reminded I needed a “real job”, as I could not find “mom” on their list of industries. Then, I got all worried I should go back to college, further my education, and give up blogging b/c I have absolutely no training or professional experience to ever make as writer. After all, I am just a mom. (Thank you for that reminder, Linked In). I foresee an open letter to Linked In coming soon to my blog.
Google+? I didn’t know I had a google+ account until I had one. Google is tricky that way. Anytime I can stick it to Google, I want to. So, I deleted it. All the others? I don’t even have the time to comment on them, so why in the world would I join them??
I do love Pinterest. I think it’s pure genius! However, I don’t have much time for that either. Facebook and twitter will be where I draw the line. In some cases, I actually enjoy those two. But, you’re absolutely right. The best thing to do is focus on blogging. Period!
I have a love/hate relationship with social media. I love blogging, but I can’t manage to keep up with the twitter and facebook stuff. Mostly I think I love writing.
Sandy
momof12 recently posted..The Construction Zone
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Exactly, Sandy! I also love writing, and that’s how I’m going to use my time.
I know how you feel!!! I have joined communities thinking it is the perfect fit and I would be involved, only to let it slip away and very seldom ever return. And they are good communities, it’s just that I can’t spend all day online and after checking w/family and friends long-distance on FB, quick recap of Twitter, my own blog posts and then I do a quick review on Feedly of blogs I follow, too much time has already passed. I joined Google +1 but don’t’ even know fully what it’s about!! I nominated you for the Liebster Award, http://www.foodfunandfotos.com/2012/04/i-would-like-to-thank-academy.html. Not sure if you quality since your blog probably doesn’t show all of your followers…and now I read that you’ve lost some with the RSS switch, so who knows?, maybe you do now
Adena recently posted..I Would Like to Thank the Academy….
Twitter: themommymess
says:
It’s not easy to keep up with all of it. Thank you so much for the award! How sweet!!
You are so right when you said “quality over quantity” – SO TRUE. Find which social sites speak to you and go there – don’t try to get on every single site because you will make yourself crazy. I actually was into Twitter and Facebook before I really took blogging seriously, so sometimes I feel like my blog takes a backseat, which I hate! But I’m getting better at balancing. As much as I’d like to get into Google+, I just don’t currently find value yet. Just know, you are not alone, girl!
Twitter: themommymess
says:
I’m not a Google+ fan, and don’t have an account. It’s just too hard to be everywhere. It’s been great to see that I’m not the only that feels like this!
I have been grappling with the whole social media universe, and I am so glad to hear that I am not alone! I started my website three months ago, and immediately felt so much pressure to “keep up with the Joneses,” grow my numbers and have a presence on social media. It all became completely overwhelming when I learned what Instagram was, and decided that I absolutely could not join one more platform. I am on facebook and twitter, but truly, as much as I would like to see those numbers grow, I am mainly concerned with growing hte number of people that actually read the blog, and the returning visitors because that means the liked it!! I truly believe that if you have great content, connect with people that are on the same page as you, and try to build your community, good things will happen.
I am so glad we “met” through the webinar, and I look forward to reading your posts!
Twitter: themommymess
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There is a pressure to keep up, but we just have to remember why we are blogging. It’s not a race or a competition.
Totally agree 100%!
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Glad I’m not alone here.
I hate that I feel like I’m missing out on opportunities, but I just can’t do more… I can’t… I don’t have time! I don’t even Tweet… just fb …
Sorta Southern Single Mom recently posted..Things Learned While Walking…Without a Dog
Oh wait, I lied… I forgot about Pinterest and BlogHer and Sits… that’s really it… I swear and I can’t even keep up with those!
Sorta Southern Single Mom recently posted..Things Learned While Walking…Without a Dog
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Haha. Your second comment cracked me up. Exactly! it’s hard to keep up.
So, now that I’ve come, read, and commented on your blog, you’re socially obligated to visit mine, right?
I agree with your sentiments – when I think about all the social media, and what wizardy goes in inside it all, I can’t help but feel like my grandpa when we bought him a laptop – fascinated, but completely confused. So I took a stance similar to your own – quality over quantity!
My views may be slightly more sarcastic than yours -http://hypertheticallyspeaking.blogspot.com/2012/02/hypocrites-are-people-too.html – but still legitimate.
You thought for a second I wasn’t going to post my URL, didn’t you?
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Haha! Jeremy, I like your style, and I haven’t even read your post yet.
Thanks! Now I’m worried my post might ruin everything. OR, maybe it will make you want to go back, and want to want to go back! Social media is so unpredictable….
Twitter: themommymess
says:
Well, not only did it make want to come back-I subscribed! Loved it!